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Thursday, January 28, 2010

January 28th, 2010

The easiest way to say something hard is to just blurt it out, "Say what you need to say."

I have never been good at this...giving myself an ulcer, holding in my anger, fear, hurt, excitement. I have always thought my emotions were written all over my face, but an ex-boyfriend recently revealed to me (and a close friend backed it up) that I hide my emotions well. Except for when I have bursted into tears...which comes as a shock. I put on an amazing front to the world where no one can tell what I am thinking. Even when I am smiling...huh.

I am always trying my best to keep an even demeanor because I think I fail so miserably, but it turns out I am succeeding.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

January 13th, 2010

All three of my closest friends are in serious relationships.

I had two failed relationships in six months.

Both of them cheated on me.

This is disconcerting.

Do I attract men who cheat?

I have never been one to become jealous of other girls...

My thinking has always been, if he wanted to be w/them, he'd ask them out, not me.

This is not to say I was blind to other woman flirting w/"my man" (which I hate that phrasing).

Yeah, I saw it. So?

But maybe this is flawed logic?
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